No magic wands I’m afraid.
I’m Type 2 and only been at it for 5 years and I have periods when I just can’t be bothered. I know I’m harming myself but can’t seem to get out of it. But I do . . . eventually. Not sure how.
You must be sick and tired of it all after all this time. And find the complications, whatever they are, hard to deal with. I’d say, be kind to yourself; try to make things more comfortable in small ways; indulge yourself a bit if you can.
If you’ve support and care around, use it now. If not, please try to love yourself. Try to get involved in a favourite interest and distract yourself a bit from health issues.
Use this Forum for support whenever you want.